I’ve always been the type who loved a good illusion.
When it comes to magic tricks I’ve always been
Front and center to witness this “great mystery.”
But that’s all it ever was to me… an illusion. You see...
Though I love a good trick, I’ve always been skeptical.
Yes, I admit I was that one kid who asked every question and ruined the entire joke. I guess you can say I’m the curious type.
I like to think a lot, and I love to understand things,
which is why I think I have sometimes preferred to have knowledge rather than friends as a kid.
I find it kinda funny and even a little contradicting that a young woman who absolutely loves to understand everything believes in a God that is far beyond her understanding.
Job 36:26 (NIV) “How great is God—beyond our understanding! The number of his years is past finding out.”
I think that has always been my biggest issue.
I could remember as a younger kid helping older kids with homework I hadn’t even learned in school yet, but decided to teach myself.
Even to this day I find myself trying to understand EVERYTHING from how cars work to what the meaning of life is.
When it comes to God it is sometimes hard for me to accept that I will never fully be able to understand him and his thinking, no matter how much I study the good book.
Sometimes I find myself looking at God as a masked magician. The magician of all magicians who never reveals the trick, and find myself skeptical of the grace and mercy he continues to give me every day.
I’m like the little kid who tried to figure out how the trick was done, questioning God on every move and decision he makes.
“Well God, why did you move me here and there?” or “God are you sure that’s what you meant to do?”
I think it’s safe to say that I’m not the only one out there who questions God.
I mean let’s sit back and really do the math here.
God sent his only son to die for us! I know its cliché and played out, but can you imagine sending your own child to die for the very people who plotted his death? Can you imagine blessing those who curse your name?
Personally… I have denied Jesus like Peter, I have betrayed him like Judas, I have walked away from him like his chosen people, I have doubted him like Thomas, and even laughed at him like Sarah and Abraham…
Can you see now why I question how someone could love me even after I have wronged him?
God will always be past our knowledge, and we won’t always be able to understand the reasons behind his actions but one thing to always remember is:
Proverbs 3:5 : “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding."
Hello! My name is India, but most people call me Indy and yes, I'm in love with God.
I have a passion for poetry, music and pretty much anything "artsy." Depending on who you ask I'm not ALWAYS known for being the one who talks a lot but there's a story behind it. I am in my sophomore year in college doing my basics and will be pursuing a career in Creative Writing and Liberal Arts. There is a lot more to my story but for now God Bless. :)